It's a good illustration, the idea is creative, and it's easy to see you put effort into this. The thing I would suggest as advice is to keep in mind where the focus lies. When I look at this piece my eyes can't decide what to look at, they don't move smooth trough this piece.
Personally I don't like to much contrasting colours.
It's a good piece and I am sure there are greater works to be expected.
Keep it up!